Investigating Helga
by Aiyta
Summary: Rhonda decides to center her Investigative Documentary assignment on figuring out the mystery of Helga Pataki.


Rhonda Wellington Lloyd grabbed the small camcorder from her bag. She was going to have the best Investigative Documentary of the entire Media class, she was certain of it.

Flipping the cap off, she turned the small lens to face her and hit the 'record' button.

"Rhonda Wellington Lloyd presents, a Hillwood High School investigative documentary, 'Who is Helga Pataki?'... let's find out." Rhonda stated in her best documentarian voice.

Helga Pataki was a friend of hers, had been since sixth grade, but Helga was also a multi-faceted mystery. She was the perfect subject for her project.

* * *

"Who Is Helga Pataki? Discuss"

"Superwoman? I wouldn't be surprised if she could fly..."

"Helga Pataki, sheesh, are you sure you should be testin' your luck?"

"Hates phony little bitches."

"Helga's pretty.. when she's not angry."

"Arrogant, cocky, self-assured"

"Impossible to deal with... Impossible to take your eyes off."

"That girl is hiding something, I just know it."

"Wolfgang asked her on a date once, she punched him in the face."

"Could never quite figure her out even if I tried."

"Hillwood's best female basketball player, hands down."

"Tough as nails."

"She pretty much runs our entire neighbourhood. Are you sure you should be asking people about her... what if she found out?"

"No way, I'm not saying a word."

"Has anybody else noticed that, she kind never carries out her threats?"

"She writes poetry, I think that's kind of cute."

"What's her deal? You should dig deeper."

"Why does she even hate Arnold so much?"

* * *

"What did you say?" Rhonda asked, raising an eyebrow at the Freshman standing in front of her camera.

"I asked why she hates Arnold Shortman so much? He's a nice kid." The Freshman repeated.

Rhonda shrugged, "They've just never liked each other."

"Why?" The small brunette asked.

"That's a good question, little.. uh, what's your name?" Rhonda enquired.

"Georgia" The young girl grinned.

"Georgia, you have just revolutionised my Media project." Rhonda declared wildly, patting the small freshman girl on the head.

Rhonda once again turned the camcorder to face her and excitedly pushed down on the small 'record' button.

"Helga Pataki and Arnold Shortman, what's behind the hatred?" Rhonda asked into the lens.

* * *

"Helga Pataki and Arnold Shortman? Discuss."

"Helga HATES him."

"I guess it makes sense for the 'bully' to hate the 'do-gooder', right"

"Everyone looks at it all wrong, he probably hates her more than she hates him."

"I don't know, that's a weird question."

"He's always sticking up for her, even after she's doused him in insults."

"I heard they kissed in fourth grade, in a Romeo and Juliet play."

"If he ever dies, we know where to look for the killer."

"Helga Pataki's personal punching bag? Actually, I've never seen her hurt him."

"Madly in love with each other."

* * *

"Curly!" Rhonda lectured, "This is supposed to be serious, I'm trying to uncover the truth!"

"I was being serious." Curly said defensively.

"Curly, let me repeat this back to you. I asked you to discuss Helga and Arnold and you responded that they were madly in love with each other." Rhonda reminded him.

"You're not taking me seriously." Curly glared.

"Of course I'm not, you freed the animals from the zoo yesterday morning and now this afternoon you're telling me that Hillwood's two greatest enemies are in love with each other." Rhonda frowned.

Curly rolled his eyes, "Come with me."

Rhonda watched him head off down the hallway, she was sceptical but followed nonetheless. Curly walked for the Janitor's Closet, pausing a few steps away from the door, "Press record." he insisted.

Rhonda reluctantly pressed the small red button on the camera, focussing it toward Curly.

"Hillwood High School, I present to you, Helga Pataki and Arnold Shortman." He announced as he flung the door to the Janitor's Closet wide open.

Rhonda struggled to keep the camera within her grasp as the small screen recorded something she never thought she'd witness.

Arnold stood with his back up against the back wall of the janitor's closet, his hair ruffled and his shirt half-unbuttoned. Helga's hair had fallen from her usual pigtails and was flowing down her back. Arnold held her tightly around the waist, one hand slightly disappearing up her shirt. Arnold and Helga were making out in the janitors closet.

Rhonda looked at Curly in awe, how had he known? Maybe she didn't want to know.

Helga quickly jumped back from Arnold's arms and focussed her gaze on Rhonda, and Rhonda's camcorder.

"Princess!" Came the ear-splitting scream.

Rhonda ran for her life, those kids had been right – trying to delve into the mysteries of Helga Pataki was asking for trouble. Helga's secret was Arnold. Rhonda smiled, it was cute, in fact it was adorable, heck it was perfect.


End file.
